Posts
That’s a nice way of saying that it’s still crunch time, as it has been for the past two weeks.
How is this possible? Can we really crunch for two weeks straight?
Maybe, and maybe not. Finance professor Sam Wylie said on Tuesday that there are three intense experiences we’ll always remember;
1) Falling in love for the first time
2) Having our first child
3) MBA first term
He also went on to say that this stress, this continued heightened awareness that the first years are living through… this is a sign of living a full life, and some people never go through this. He then went on to say that after finals, after our stress is gone, our life will be less full, and we’ll revert to being regular members of the living dead. :)
Talk about inspiration. Sam Wylie’s an excellent speaker, and he delivered his message effectively and humorously. Apparently he does this every semester… so my guess is that he’s inspired many of us to never have kids. :)
Inspiration notwithstanding, the last two weeks have been absolutely ridiculous. We haven’t really started recruiting yet (that starts in Feb, in what’s called the ‘milk round’), but in recent memory, I’ve basically been spending most of my days trying furiously to finish syndicate assignments and master the class material before exams, which start on Monday. Unlike most schools, Melbourne Business School doesn’t believe in down time between the end of classes and finals… in other words, we learned new, testable material this past week. As a result, this weekend I’ve had no problem staying in and hitting the books hard… while of course taking the occasional break to watch Coldplay videos.
In the meantime, the heightened pace of life has led to short-fuses; people are snapping at each other with increased frequency. My conscious effort to stay upbeat has been severely tested; after being in the military for so long, it feels like it’s almost an insult to my manhood to not snap at someone who’s snapped at me first. That sentence looks odd on paper; goes to show that some of the prior culture hasn’t quite left me yet.
In the end, maybe that’s the value of this experience. Maybe it has something to do with increased effectiveness; something to do with being able to get the most out of every day.
Will keep you posted. In the meantime, accounting beckons :)
^_^
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Crunch!
With a little over two weeks before finals (two weeks and about half a day, to be exact), it’s pretty much crunch time at Melbourne Business School. Syndicate assignments have been due at pretty regular intervals… the last one is statistics, which took significant time this weekend. As did Accounting.
Brains work in funny ways; I think when the press is on, the body somehow magically adjusts, and the mind can do things it ordinarily doesn’t realize it can. Efficiency goes way up… or maybe that’s just because, post-consulting presentation, I’ve been getting a good amount of sleep every day. Something has made a WORLD of difference... maybe it's that. :)
Either way, this weekend was extremely productive, but not all that exciting; probably the most exciting thing that happened was a load of laundry. Well, maybe a spontaneous lunch yesterday with some MBS people… we ran into each other at MBS, of course. Funny how that happens. Especially during these next two weeks.
Ha ha. The syndicate rooms are absolutely full this time of year; a few months ago it was hard to imagine that all those rooms might be taken, but on the way home yesterday there were a bunch of second years camped out in the stairwell. It feels like a tsunami sometimes… but that’s the nature of it, I think.
That being said, as much as we’re doing now, what’s happening on the other side of the world, with classes, grades, recruiting, and the economy imploding every few days... seems insane. The Dow was down 4% on Friday, but that’s become normal. We’ll see what happens with GM… but the fact that the biggest US car manufacturer will run out of cash this quarter can’t be good news for the US. Obama's got his work cut out for him.
Compared to that, we have it easy over here. A few company visits (only maybe 1-2 a week), but it’s by design, as recruiting doesn’t really start until February anyway. So far, the B-school students aren’t in a position to see company targets, but I’d be surprised if they’re significantly affected in any way, shape or form. That’s the beauty of Oz… it really takes care of the masses -- in true Aussie tradition, the government backed the banks before any damage could be done, and, though finance might be hit, it seems like the rest of the industries will go on as before, or close to it.
And so… we students focus on our grades. Because, if we do well, we will get interviews. Good feeling. But not very exciting. At least for the next two weeks :)
^_^
P.S. In case you missed it, Melbourne Business School's career placement is up, and is good... especially when you factor in cost of living here, and realize that the Aussie Dollar was about 1:1 with the USD at the time of these salaries. Yes, it's fallen, but price levels here have stayed exactly the same, of course. It's not like we're importing Tropicana Orange Juice, trader Joe's, or even In N' Out... though we do have a burger chain called Grilled' which is pretty good. You can view the career statistics here.
Brains work in funny ways; I think when the press is on, the body somehow magically adjusts, and the mind can do things it ordinarily doesn’t realize it can. Efficiency goes way up… or maybe that’s just because, post-consulting presentation, I’ve been getting a good amount of sleep every day. Something has made a WORLD of difference... maybe it's that. :)
Either way, this weekend was extremely productive, but not all that exciting; probably the most exciting thing that happened was a load of laundry. Well, maybe a spontaneous lunch yesterday with some MBS people… we ran into each other at MBS, of course. Funny how that happens. Especially during these next two weeks.
Ha ha. The syndicate rooms are absolutely full this time of year; a few months ago it was hard to imagine that all those rooms might be taken, but on the way home yesterday there were a bunch of second years camped out in the stairwell. It feels like a tsunami sometimes… but that’s the nature of it, I think.
That being said, as much as we’re doing now, what’s happening on the other side of the world, with classes, grades, recruiting, and the economy imploding every few days... seems insane. The Dow was down 4% on Friday, but that’s become normal. We’ll see what happens with GM… but the fact that the biggest US car manufacturer will run out of cash this quarter can’t be good news for the US. Obama's got his work cut out for him.
Compared to that, we have it easy over here. A few company visits (only maybe 1-2 a week), but it’s by design, as recruiting doesn’t really start until February anyway. So far, the B-school students aren’t in a position to see company targets, but I’d be surprised if they’re significantly affected in any way, shape or form. That’s the beauty of Oz… it really takes care of the masses -- in true Aussie tradition, the government backed the banks before any damage could be done, and, though finance might be hit, it seems like the rest of the industries will go on as before, or close to it.
And so… we students focus on our grades. Because, if we do well, we will get interviews. Good feeling. But not very exciting. At least for the next two weeks :)
^_^
P.S. In case you missed it, Melbourne Business School's career placement is up, and is good... especially when you factor in cost of living here, and realize that the Aussie Dollar was about 1:1 with the USD at the time of these salaries. Yes, it's fallen, but price levels here have stayed exactly the same, of course. It's not like we're importing Tropicana Orange Juice, trader Joe's, or even In N' Out... though we do have a burger chain called Grilled' which is pretty good. You can view the career statistics here.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
post-presentation letdown
O’ Cell Phone, where are you?
It wasn’t so long ago that I was wandering around Penn’s campus. In the space of one summer, everything changed; suddenly everyone I knew went wireless, gaining instant accessibility for a quick and easy $50 / month.
Don’t know whether it was stubbornness, a desire to live in the moment, or a trend against groupthink… but I waited and waited to get a cell phone until I was literally one of the last standing still tied to land lines. Within about a week, I realized how convenient cell phones were, even given the continual risk of it going off at awkward times if you forget to turn it off (like it did during accounting on Thursday). The moment can wait… so much easier to send a quick and reliable text to make sure your friends wanted to meet you at the button instead of the compass. My cell phone has saved my social life on numerous occasions :)
But now, it's gone. Vanished. Poof.
Lack of sleep had something to do with it; it got left behind somewhere between the client retreat and this comfy studio apartment. If it were really important, it could probably be tracked down… but it might take a week or two to get it back. On the other hand, replacement cost is low, so… yeah. Buying a new one. Working = money = insulation from inconvenience. Pretty straightforward decision, right? Revenue versus cost at its best. Who said economics has no place in life?
:)
Thinking about the cell phone took my mind off the other stuff… had an awesome and productive night during Friday Karaoke… love the Karaoke, especially with a fair selection of songs. This particular karaoke bar was Chinese… and since our group was the ‘Asean’ group of Melbourne Business School, it seemed like every third or fourth song was sung in Mandarin. Pretty neat, and pretty diverse :)
But yeah… at the end of the day, still finding a tough time disengaging from the project. We did such an amazing job getting everyone onboard with some exciting changes (yes, we can! :)), and then left before seeing those changes implemented. We’ll see these guys again next year, but in the meantime, what’s going to happen? And is there anything else we can do to help? But we’re no longer involved. It’s no longer our place. We’re the consultants… brought in to consult. Afterward, we go on our way and leave the clients to use our ideas and recommendations to help them do their job. Their job. Not our job.
I think that’s the toughest thing. I feel so invested in these guys that I want to see them succeed; they’re really good people and they’re going about profit the right way. But instead of being part of the team… instead of helping them integrate solutions or refine strategy, I’m instead listening to Teddy Geiger and refining the strategy of how much time to spend moving / decorating versus prepping for MPHP tomorrow.
Seems like doing meaningful work in a team is so much more motivating than doing meaningful work for myself.
Because decorating is meaningful. As is MPHP! Totally. :)
^_^
P.S. MPHP really is meaningful; the way we thought about organizational strategy in Managing People for High Performance led directly to some conclusions regarding one very real company providing a very real service to very real people. So there! :)
It wasn’t so long ago that I was wandering around Penn’s campus. In the space of one summer, everything changed; suddenly everyone I knew went wireless, gaining instant accessibility for a quick and easy $50 / month.
Don’t know whether it was stubbornness, a desire to live in the moment, or a trend against groupthink… but I waited and waited to get a cell phone until I was literally one of the last standing still tied to land lines. Within about a week, I realized how convenient cell phones were, even given the continual risk of it going off at awkward times if you forget to turn it off (like it did during accounting on Thursday). The moment can wait… so much easier to send a quick and reliable text to make sure your friends wanted to meet you at the button instead of the compass. My cell phone has saved my social life on numerous occasions :)
But now, it's gone. Vanished. Poof.
Lack of sleep had something to do with it; it got left behind somewhere between the client retreat and this comfy studio apartment. If it were really important, it could probably be tracked down… but it might take a week or two to get it back. On the other hand, replacement cost is low, so… yeah. Buying a new one. Working = money = insulation from inconvenience. Pretty straightforward decision, right? Revenue versus cost at its best. Who said economics has no place in life?
:)
Thinking about the cell phone took my mind off the other stuff… had an awesome and productive night during Friday Karaoke… love the Karaoke, especially with a fair selection of songs. This particular karaoke bar was Chinese… and since our group was the ‘Asean’ group of Melbourne Business School, it seemed like every third or fourth song was sung in Mandarin. Pretty neat, and pretty diverse :)
But yeah… at the end of the day, still finding a tough time disengaging from the project. We did such an amazing job getting everyone onboard with some exciting changes (yes, we can! :)), and then left before seeing those changes implemented. We’ll see these guys again next year, but in the meantime, what’s going to happen? And is there anything else we can do to help? But we’re no longer involved. It’s no longer our place. We’re the consultants… brought in to consult. Afterward, we go on our way and leave the clients to use our ideas and recommendations to help them do their job. Their job. Not our job.
I think that’s the toughest thing. I feel so invested in these guys that I want to see them succeed; they’re really good people and they’re going about profit the right way. But instead of being part of the team… instead of helping them integrate solutions or refine strategy, I’m instead listening to Teddy Geiger and refining the strategy of how much time to spend moving / decorating versus prepping for MPHP tomorrow.
Seems like doing meaningful work in a team is so much more motivating than doing meaningful work for myself.
Because decorating is meaningful. As is MPHP! Totally. :)
^_^
P.S. MPHP really is meaningful; the way we thought about organizational strategy in Managing People for High Performance led directly to some conclusions regarding one very real company providing a very real service to very real people. So there! :)
Thursday, November 6, 2008
consulting presentation
The best thing about Oz… is that’s it’s so far away from home. So far away from everything that’s going on in American politics.
Obama just won the presidency; if all goes according to plan, he’ll take office in Jan, which the world hopes will signal and end to this global uncertainty. Maybe it will and maybe it won’t, but his message here is hope… hope that we can do better after this last president, who, by the way, got his MBA from HBS. Isn’t that something?
In Oz, like in Korea, the general population follows American politics… after traveling to a few different countries, I realize how much reach the US really has, from politics to movies and even to education centers. For instance, a graduate from any school in the US is set in Asia… for whatever reason, it seems like Asians have an inferiority complex about their own schools and think America is where it’s at. Maybe the 300m people in the States contain every single smart person in the world; maybe there are no good educators or smart students who choose to study elsewhere in the world besides the US of A.
That was sarcasm, by the way. Just in case you’re confused :) Though it still surprises me that the world follows American politics… mostly because America doesn’t even follow American politics. Right? :)
Here in Oz, I’m not really concerned about Obama, but am instead concerned about the final company presentation for my major client. It starts in about 9 hours. I’m excited and nervous and a little bit sad; while developing the presentation of roughly 60 slides, I’ve invested so much time in learning the ins and outs of the company that I really will miss it.
I like this company. It’s made up of good people, and its customers are very satisfied. And that’s all that will be said; consulting is an industry shrouded in mystery and any more disclosure may get me sued. Consulting good, sued bad – easy mantra to follow :)
The point, though, is that I’ve spent so much energy in the firm, and I’m not yet ready to move on. I want to see how this firm handles next year; how they grow and develop over the strategy initiatives they themselves generated with our help. I also want to see the board again; they’re charming people, competent, and really have some good understanding about how to make things work in the future. I really like them. Good people.
So hopefully me and my boss can convince these guys to implement good recommendations; hopefully we can make a difference in their profitability and strategy. Am definitely nervous and excited. Will keep you posted :)
^_^
Obama just won the presidency; if all goes according to plan, he’ll take office in Jan, which the world hopes will signal and end to this global uncertainty. Maybe it will and maybe it won’t, but his message here is hope… hope that we can do better after this last president, who, by the way, got his MBA from HBS. Isn’t that something?
In Oz, like in Korea, the general population follows American politics… after traveling to a few different countries, I realize how much reach the US really has, from politics to movies and even to education centers. For instance, a graduate from any school in the US is set in Asia… for whatever reason, it seems like Asians have an inferiority complex about their own schools and think America is where it’s at. Maybe the 300m people in the States contain every single smart person in the world; maybe there are no good educators or smart students who choose to study elsewhere in the world besides the US of A.
That was sarcasm, by the way. Just in case you’re confused :) Though it still surprises me that the world follows American politics… mostly because America doesn’t even follow American politics. Right? :)
Here in Oz, I’m not really concerned about Obama, but am instead concerned about the final company presentation for my major client. It starts in about 9 hours. I’m excited and nervous and a little bit sad; while developing the presentation of roughly 60 slides, I’ve invested so much time in learning the ins and outs of the company that I really will miss it.
I like this company. It’s made up of good people, and its customers are very satisfied. And that’s all that will be said; consulting is an industry shrouded in mystery and any more disclosure may get me sued. Consulting good, sued bad – easy mantra to follow :)
The point, though, is that I’ve spent so much energy in the firm, and I’m not yet ready to move on. I want to see how this firm handles next year; how they grow and develop over the strategy initiatives they themselves generated with our help. I also want to see the board again; they’re charming people, competent, and really have some good understanding about how to make things work in the future. I really like them. Good people.
So hopefully me and my boss can convince these guys to implement good recommendations; hopefully we can make a difference in their profitability and strategy. Am definitely nervous and excited. Will keep you posted :)
^_^
Monday, November 3, 2008
moved!
Moved up in the world! Literally. From UniLodge (2nd floor) … to Unilodge (6th floor). But more importantly, moved from a one bedroom with two people (recently 3, as a friend of my roomie was staying with us for at least a few weeks) to a pretty spacious studio.
Spacious means 500 square feet or so, and a good enough layout that it doesn’t feel cramped. And a sweet view of Vic Library. You can now visit me in Melbourne! Well, after I buy new plates and stuff. And a sleeping bag or two.
I really like this apartment and the idea that I’m going to collapse on a bed, free from outside noise, about 15 seconds after this entry gets posted. More than that, I like the idea that this is an actual apartment… about as big as my place was in Hawaii. It’s comfortably small… the operative word, however, is comfortable.
Don’t get me wrong; I like my old roommate, and we’re definitely friends. And the old apartment did have character. But I’m happy to move out, primarily because my hours were so different than his. The room was small enough that when my roommate came back at night, the loud door woke me up, and though he did his best to stay silent, his pattering kept me from falling immediately back asleep. To be perfectly honest, I don’t think I’ve slept through the night more than a handful of times in the past two months. Crazy.
How did this affect the MBA? Was the attention span so diluted that it became hard to study or to pay attention in class? Did the days and nights of waking up during his calls to India have a significant negative impact on everything else?
Not that it’s his fault, at all. At all. He’s a great guy… always cooked and vacuumed without any complaint, and he continuously went out of his way to be as stealth as possible. He really did. But there comes a point when it’s best to accept reality and expand the option set. No matter how much effort he spent, a single would still be optimal.
To be honest, I don’t have a clue as to why I didn’t think of moving out earlier; we spent so much time trying to figure out ways to peacefully co-exist, when it’s obviously so much better for both of us to keep our own schedules apart.
But it was two months. Maybe more. How in the world did it take me two full months to realize it might be worth walking downstairs and finding out if an apartment building with 270 vacancies might have something open? When I finally realized it was worth a look, there were 3 openings, with two more coming up next week. These weren’t the first apartments available; likely there were some available a matter of weeks after I initially moved in here; I could have made the move a month ago. If I’d done that, would my midterms have gone better? I think the answer is probably yes. And the quality of life would’ve been higher as well.
The lesson here is… there are always more options, and many times, those options are worth taking. Especially if it means sleeping at night. I think if we can make sure we see these options… life becomes better for everyone.
And that’s the feel good story of the day. Expand the pie by looking at new options; but do it before you lose sleep.
^_^
Spacious means 500 square feet or so, and a good enough layout that it doesn’t feel cramped. And a sweet view of Vic Library. You can now visit me in Melbourne! Well, after I buy new plates and stuff. And a sleeping bag or two.
I really like this apartment and the idea that I’m going to collapse on a bed, free from outside noise, about 15 seconds after this entry gets posted. More than that, I like the idea that this is an actual apartment… about as big as my place was in Hawaii. It’s comfortably small… the operative word, however, is comfortable.
Don’t get me wrong; I like my old roommate, and we’re definitely friends. And the old apartment did have character. But I’m happy to move out, primarily because my hours were so different than his. The room was small enough that when my roommate came back at night, the loud door woke me up, and though he did his best to stay silent, his pattering kept me from falling immediately back asleep. To be perfectly honest, I don’t think I’ve slept through the night more than a handful of times in the past two months. Crazy.
How did this affect the MBA? Was the attention span so diluted that it became hard to study or to pay attention in class? Did the days and nights of waking up during his calls to India have a significant negative impact on everything else?
Not that it’s his fault, at all. At all. He’s a great guy… always cooked and vacuumed without any complaint, and he continuously went out of his way to be as stealth as possible. He really did. But there comes a point when it’s best to accept reality and expand the option set. No matter how much effort he spent, a single would still be optimal.
To be honest, I don’t have a clue as to why I didn’t think of moving out earlier; we spent so much time trying to figure out ways to peacefully co-exist, when it’s obviously so much better for both of us to keep our own schedules apart.
But it was two months. Maybe more. How in the world did it take me two full months to realize it might be worth walking downstairs and finding out if an apartment building with 270 vacancies might have something open? When I finally realized it was worth a look, there were 3 openings, with two more coming up next week. These weren’t the first apartments available; likely there were some available a matter of weeks after I initially moved in here; I could have made the move a month ago. If I’d done that, would my midterms have gone better? I think the answer is probably yes. And the quality of life would’ve been higher as well.
The lesson here is… there are always more options, and many times, those options are worth taking. Especially if it means sleeping at night. I think if we can make sure we see these options… life becomes better for everyone.
And that’s the feel good story of the day. Expand the pie by looking at new options; but do it before you lose sleep.
^_^
Sunday, November 2, 2008
dating
November. Yikes.
This last week has gone by in a blur; got the midterms completely back and had an interesting experience in economics class. That last clause is an understatement; those of you who were here at MBS can see the offending entry at the bottom of this page; those who were not can ask via personal e-mail if you’re truly interested. Basically there are times and places for everything and this blog is not an appropriate forum to discuss what happened on Wednesday afternoon.
Wednesday morning, though, was a different story; went over to Tribal to hit the recording studio to do some voiceover work for the 3-minute video segment MBS is putting together. Cautiously optimistic about what might happen; I really like the film crew, so hopefully me and Sin don’t look like munchkins when they zoom cameras onto our faces. Also, loved the studio and once again had a flighty thought about trying to be a recording exec; maybe worth looking into if this whole consulting thing doesn’t work out. Or maybe even if it does; always worth using the brain to figure how to increase possibilities instead of shutting them down.
The thing that’s been on my mind this past week, though, is dating.
A couple of buddies on the east coast are wrestling with this very question; they’re both studying, and met someone they think they might be interested in, but both sets of prospective couples have very different career goals, and a mammoth of possible difficulties. To be more specific, one has an offer in NY while the girl is international and will move back home when this is all said and done. Both friends and their perspectives are late 20s, early 30s. And yes, I’ve run this entry by them (that’s part of the reason there hasn’t been an entry all week), and they’re ok with this question being up here in this forum.
But the question is… what’s the right answer?
No easy answers to this one… on the one hand, chemistry doesn’t come all that often, so when we see it, maybe we should grab for it and hold on with all we’ve got. On the other hand, it feels irresponsible to start a relationship with someone if you know the relationship will end in flames.
So the question is… do you start a relationship with only half the stars aligned? If everything is perfect except for the one thing that actually matters?
I suppose people move all the time, maybe the guy can give up his offer or the girl can leave her family behind. We see it all the time in movies, so it must be true… but this guy chose this B-school specifically because he wanted to work in NY, and he did well to get the exact offer he wanted even in these turbulent times. He would be giving up his entire life as he knows it if he chose to leave, and given that both people’s plans are set in stone, dating when there is no future seems flighty as well.
No easy answers; seems like this is one of those moments you look back on, hoping you choose the right path. And probably, if five years from now, if you’re looking back at this, that’s proof that you’ve actually made the wrong call. But hopefully it means we’ve learned from it.
Maybe the compromise is to try to work things out, and deal with the long distance thing if it comes to that. For all we know, these issues will work themselves out by then. And if not, hopefully we’ve learned something? At this age, that’s all that really matters anyway… right?
Cynthia would agree with that one. At least the, ‘let’s try to make things work’ angle and the ‘follow your heart’ angle. Sin’s got a big heart… can’t imagine she has that much trouble following it... :)
That being said, I’m not sure I agree with her thoughts, simply because of my own experience. If I had hadn't frozen during my interview at Tuck, I likely would’ve followed my last girlfriend to New Hampshire even though I wasn’t that stoked about the school (no offense to Tuck or any Tuckies, but Melbourne fits a lot better). And we would’ve broken up either way… or, worse yet, we’d get married and start having kids, which, in hindsight, probably would have turned out terribly. But I would’ve learned something.
I would’ve learned never to compromise my own ideals for someone else’s goals; to never give up the things so important to me for the hopes of a future so undefined.
What a terrible lesson to learn. And I would've learned that lesson in a place that wasn't the right fit; with a vastly different set of opportunities than I have here in Melbourne. Life as I know it now would not exist, and there is no way I'd be able to explore a culture while holding down a part-time consulting gig. Is this life better than that life would have been? There's really no way to know, but I think it is. I really do.
No easy answers…
^_^
This last week has gone by in a blur; got the midterms completely back and had an interesting experience in economics class. That last clause is an understatement; those of you who were here at MBS can see the offending entry at the bottom of this page; those who were not can ask via personal e-mail if you’re truly interested. Basically there are times and places for everything and this blog is not an appropriate forum to discuss what happened on Wednesday afternoon.
Wednesday morning, though, was a different story; went over to Tribal to hit the recording studio to do some voiceover work for the 3-minute video segment MBS is putting together. Cautiously optimistic about what might happen; I really like the film crew, so hopefully me and Sin don’t look like munchkins when they zoom cameras onto our faces. Also, loved the studio and once again had a flighty thought about trying to be a recording exec; maybe worth looking into if this whole consulting thing doesn’t work out. Or maybe even if it does; always worth using the brain to figure how to increase possibilities instead of shutting them down.
The thing that’s been on my mind this past week, though, is dating.
A couple of buddies on the east coast are wrestling with this very question; they’re both studying, and met someone they think they might be interested in, but both sets of prospective couples have very different career goals, and a mammoth of possible difficulties. To be more specific, one has an offer in NY while the girl is international and will move back home when this is all said and done. Both friends and their perspectives are late 20s, early 30s. And yes, I’ve run this entry by them (that’s part of the reason there hasn’t been an entry all week), and they’re ok with this question being up here in this forum.
But the question is… what’s the right answer?
No easy answers to this one… on the one hand, chemistry doesn’t come all that often, so when we see it, maybe we should grab for it and hold on with all we’ve got. On the other hand, it feels irresponsible to start a relationship with someone if you know the relationship will end in flames.
So the question is… do you start a relationship with only half the stars aligned? If everything is perfect except for the one thing that actually matters?
I suppose people move all the time, maybe the guy can give up his offer or the girl can leave her family behind. We see it all the time in movies, so it must be true… but this guy chose this B-school specifically because he wanted to work in NY, and he did well to get the exact offer he wanted even in these turbulent times. He would be giving up his entire life as he knows it if he chose to leave, and given that both people’s plans are set in stone, dating when there is no future seems flighty as well.
No easy answers; seems like this is one of those moments you look back on, hoping you choose the right path. And probably, if five years from now, if you’re looking back at this, that’s proof that you’ve actually made the wrong call. But hopefully it means we’ve learned from it.
Maybe the compromise is to try to work things out, and deal with the long distance thing if it comes to that. For all we know, these issues will work themselves out by then. And if not, hopefully we’ve learned something? At this age, that’s all that really matters anyway… right?
Cynthia would agree with that one. At least the, ‘let’s try to make things work’ angle and the ‘follow your heart’ angle. Sin’s got a big heart… can’t imagine she has that much trouble following it... :)
That being said, I’m not sure I agree with her thoughts, simply because of my own experience. If I had hadn't frozen during my interview at Tuck, I likely would’ve followed my last girlfriend to New Hampshire even though I wasn’t that stoked about the school (no offense to Tuck or any Tuckies, but Melbourne fits a lot better). And we would’ve broken up either way… or, worse yet, we’d get married and start having kids, which, in hindsight, probably would have turned out terribly. But I would’ve learned something.
I would’ve learned never to compromise my own ideals for someone else’s goals; to never give up the things so important to me for the hopes of a future so undefined.
What a terrible lesson to learn. And I would've learned that lesson in a place that wasn't the right fit; with a vastly different set of opportunities than I have here in Melbourne. Life as I know it now would not exist, and there is no way I'd be able to explore a culture while holding down a part-time consulting gig. Is this life better than that life would have been? There's really no way to know, but I think it is. I really do.
No easy answers…
^_^
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